C.S. Lewis, author of the Narnia series pointed out that wives who rule over their husbands despise them. They will gladly rule their men because then they can have everything their way — but simultaneously, they will despise their men for being weak.
Here we are today, where there are too many weak overly-feminized men who desperately want approval from women.
These men bend to any woman's will no matter what. And more recently some men identify as “male feminists.”
I can’t believe I have to say this, but there’s nothing wrong with being a man who wants equal rights for women and who wants to break up traditional gender roles. Every man should want this.
But any man whose primary identity is as a feminist is being deceptive — and dangerously so. This is especially true if you’re a single man: you’re declaring yourself to be more interested in the opposite gender, but not in a sexual way. That’s a giant red flag.
And while some feminine men may be attractive to women at first, it never works out in the long term. Here’s why.
This is why women date feminine men and then dump them
Your average American male in 2023 is chronically single.
According to Pew Research, almost 70% of young men are single whereas only around 30% of young women are.
But research shows the vast majority of both men and women aren’t happy in today’s dating scene. Why? It’s because successful women are forced to date down as they make greater strides in their careers—while successful young men become a rarer species.
Imagine both genders as great white sharks.
Successful women, though, go out and date penguins instead of dating their own species. They date their food.
The penguin brings them whatever they want, it kisses up to them, and the girl can even spit at it if she wants. And when she’s finally bored of it — she eats him. That’s that.
My sister would only date down from an intellectual standpoint and would always be dissatisfied in the long term.
The guys she dated wouldn’t challenge her, they always agreed with her hot takes, and you could almost always tell they were secretly afraid of her.
When my sister inevitably got bored she’d break up with them, or worse, they were ‘friend-zoned.’ In reality, it's easy to avoid the friend zone. Be honest with women and tell them what you want.
If you want to ask them out, ask them out. If you disagree with them, disagree. If all you want is a friend’s with benefits situation then explain that. Maybe it’ll blow up in your face. That’s better than years of living a lie.
Here’s a tip: What women “want to hear” is not usually what makes them attracted to you. It’s instead challenging them on many different fronts, including intellectually, comedically, athletically, and financially. Sometimes it’s incorporating one of those things; other times it’s all of them.
I know. The men from BuzzFeed reading this are now punching the air in their frustration.
This drug changed everything
The birth control pill is the most effective drug in modern history.
In 1970, medical degrees were over 90% male. Law degrees and MBAs were over 95% male. Dentistry degrees were 99% male. Then everything changed with the creation of the birth control pill in 1970.
Women were no longer destined to become mothers at an early age.
However, birth control also changed the dating landscape forever.
Modern women are having more sex with high-value men, while modern men are remaining virgins or becoming incels. The share of men under 30 in the U.S. who aren’t having sex has nearly tripled between 2008 and 2018, according to data published in the Washington Post.
Why weak sexless men should terrify you
We need men. Strong men. Both metaphorically and physically. We don’t need future simps, future doormats, and future cleanup guys. Yes or yes?
As Carl Jung asserts in his book “Aion,” it isn’t strong men you should be afraid of—but weak men. These men talk shit behind your back, virtue signal towards feminists and are secretly abusive to women.
They live a fake life to get the approval of women. It’s pathetic.
Unfortunately, we’re living in a society that is mass manufacturing scared men. A couple of years back a male feminist killed himself after the girl he loved falsely accused him of sexual abuse at a women’s march.
Then the guy’s mother “decided not to shame the woman who shamed him, or to take further action.” She protected the woman who caused her son’s suicide rather than get justice for him. We’re living in a clown world.
Men allowed this to happen. Not women.
“Strong men create good times, good times create weak men, weak men create hard times, hard times create strong men.” — Michael Hopf
Weak men allowed this destabilized society to take form. Not women.
The Harvey Weinsteins of the world who abused their power; the parents who failed in raising their children; the Adam Conover's and other journalists who pontificated about the dangers of ‘toxic masculinity.’ And, of course, the college institutions that didn’t equip men with skills that people are willing to pay for.
However, women’s views of men have been seriously pathologized as well. Women, especially radical feminists, cannot distinguish between male authority and male tyrannical power.
Many women’s studies websites will openly say something like this:
Heterosexuality? That’s a tyranny
Capitalism? That’s a tyranny.
Democracy? Well, that doesn’t even exist and even if it did it’d be a tyranny.
Former Cosmopolitan editor Sue Browder opened up in her book “Subverted: How I Helped the Sexual Revolution Hijack the Women’s Movement” about how the writers openly lied to women about always being dissatisfied with their men.
She called it propagandizing to women.
Not every man in power gained it by being scum. Every time Joe Rogan or Jordan Peterson says, ‘Stand up for yourself. Be a man,’ they aren’t saying to oppress women.
They’re saying we can have healthy masculinity that isn’t domineering, abusive, or neglectful. We can have all the benefits that feminism has accommodated for women without losing our identity as men!
In Closing
So now that I’ve written this and I’m probably burned alive at the stake, I’d like to add that men come in many different sizes.
We’re blue-collar workers, white-collar workers, nerds, and jocks and we have both masculine and feminine aspects. Carl Jung often highlights the importance of incorporating both.
However, while the feminist spirit is alive and well today, the masculine spirit is entirely demonized and, thanks to deadbeat neglectful dads, abandoned.
This has led to a destabilized society.
A few core male ethics are critical to raising good men.
A good man is dangerous. They aren’t nice guys but they can be kind. They work harder on themselves more than they do on their jobs. They avoid passive-aggressiveness and will be brutally honest. Above all, they have a purpose.
We all pay the price for weakness when it becomes not ok to critique.
Become your best self; if someone can’t handle that, you’re better off without them.
“I generally don’t like living in a world where being what a man is, is a horrible thing; and no matter what a woman is, is a wonderful thing.” — Patrice O’Neal
Thank you for your honesty and courage to say the things a lot of people think but don't say.
I am a woman and I say that things went too far and its time everyone stop lying to themselves and the world. Heterosexual women want masculine men and hetero men want feminine women. They may say otherwise but on a deeper level it is a lie.
Feminine doesn't mean weak or submissive as much as masculine does not mean abusive or aggressive. The dialog about masculine and feminine got so messed up that soon there will be hard to define either, especially for younger generations. Let's not let the desire to be populist, politically correct and pleasing get in a way of the objective reality, a.k.a. truth
Your numbers are a little exaggerated. The Pew study from 2022, cited in that Hill article you linked, shows 63% of men 18-29 are single, whereas 34% of women the same age are single. https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2023/02/08/for-valentines-day-5-facts-about-single-americans/
Pew defines "single" as "not married, living with a partner or in a committed romantic relationship."
I'd be curious how often young women date older men, and vice-versa. No clue whether this would impact those percentages. Just musing.
What I find a tad surprising is that Pew published identical research in 2020. 32% of women in the 18-29 category were single. Basically, no change. But 51% of men in the 18-29 category were single. So, if the survey is any good, there was a significant shift of single young men pre-COVID to post-COVID. Interesting.
Just speculating, but I wonder if this suggests that socialization (and the development of social skills) are more important for young men than women.
Then again, it could just be the Tinder effect. A few hot guys have each convinced 10X women that they are in a "committed romantic relationship." ;-)